Trapped in the Scroll? The (Im) perfect Guide for Families with their “Heads Down”

ENGLISH

4 min read

Picture this: you're delivering a lecture to your teenager about smartphone overuse... and suddenly you realise you've been scrolling Instagram for 20 minutes. Tea's gone cold, rant's running hot. Sound familiar? Welcome to the digital hypocrisy club! The transition from little children to little adults is like stepping onto a moving walkway... except nobody gave you instructions on where it's headed, and sometimes it starts speeding up without warning.

Millennials vs. the digital world

If you're a Gen Y parent, you remember life before smartphones, when the internet made dial-up sounds and photos were taken on film. Your kids - Gen Z (born 1997-2012) and Alpha (2010-2025) - don't know any other reality than having YouTube on one screen and TikTok on another...

Ofcom's 2025 report shows that children as young as 3-4 are actively using tablets, and many get their first smartphone before they learn their times tables. Internet Matters (2025) sees this as a positive trend: children are now more willing to talk to parents about their online activities, and parents are increasingly using digital tools to set boundaries. There is hope!

Warning: Red flags!

It's not about the time spent in front of screens, but how it's used... Here are the warning signs worth knowing:

Generation Alpha (2-12 years):

Hysteria when turning off screens - and we're not talking about the classic "I don't want to go to bed!"
Abandoning toys and games for tablets 24/7
Sleep problems and difficulty falling asleep
Less creative play and family interaction
Drop in self-esteem and loss of interest in former passions (in older kids)

Generation Z (13-17 years):

Isolating themselves and constantly being "offline at home, online with the world"
Mood swings, especially when screen access is limited
Poor academic results, despite previous success
Difficulty controlling online time - even when they want to change it

Ofcom (2025) confirms: many children openly admit they feel "addicted" to their phones.

What you can do (without going crazy)

For younger children (Alpha):

Set clear and predictable rules: for example, zero screens during meals, in bedrooms, and one hour before sleep
Create a special "rescue box" - full of crayons, blocks, books, and other toys. There's one catch: kids can only use it when they put away their devices!
Watch together and comment on what you see - turn passive scrolling into active, shared learning
With 8-12 year olds, create a "family digital agreement." Base it on planning, trust, and cooperation, not on bans, control, and authority!

For teenagers (Z):

Conversation, not commands: know that many teenagers see the problem but don't know how to handle it or how to tell you about it without being judged or punished
Look together for screen alternatives that satisfy the same needs (relaxation, connection, entertainment)
Help them establish their own boundaries - time-tracking apps, "offline routines," putting phones away before sleep
Position yourself as a coach, not a cop. Internet Matters (2025) emphasises: open communication works best when it comes to technology use!

Let's talk about Instagram, or the world in "enhanced" version

Social media is now everyday life - especially for teenagers who shape their identity almost entirely through its lens. And while it's impossible to cut them off from the network, it's worth helping them understand one thing: what they see online isn't reality, but a controlled illusion. Perfect bodies, perfect families, eternal vacations and successes? These are life's highlights - carefully selected and often enhanced with filters. Talking about how this mechanism works is one of the most important digital topics worth discussing with your child.

But careful: social media isn't pure evil. As the Internet Matters (2025) report shows, young people genuinely derive value from them - it's a space for self-expression and maintaining connections. The problem starts when other people's "perfect" lives become the only point of reference, or when nasty comments appear under their own photos...

That's why the key isn't in bans, but in building a healthy relationship with technology. As Internet Matters notes, we live in an "internet of extremes," where expression goes hand in hand with pressure. And it's precisely in this balance - between authenticity and distance - that parents have the biggest role to play.

Start with yourself (yes, seriously)

Your children see how you use your phone. Do you scroll during dinner? They will too.

Parents' digital habits significantly influence children, who learn more from observing parents than from what comes out of their mouths... Instead of fighting technology, show mindful use of it:

Set your own boundaries (and stick to them): e.g., phones in the kitchen basket after 8pm. Show that you also have other passions and ways to spend free time
Speak openly about when you struggle too: you become more human to them, and they have more self-compassion, which paradoxically motivates them to limit screens
Create offline rituals: board games, cooking together, family walks without phones

Sleep and movement - the special task force duo

Sleep is the foundation. And screens, emitting blue light, are its biggest saboteurs. Consider charging phones together... outside the bedroom.

Meanwhile, the NHS (2024) reminds us: children and young people need at least 60 minutes of physical activity daily (and younger ones need up to 180 minutes!). Movement isn't just health - it's a natural way to break away from screens.

And finally: find your own balance

It's not about 24/7 digital detox. It's about technology supporting, not disrupting, your relationships and children's development. Some days will be perfect, full of activity and presence, others you'll spend scrolling in pajamas. And that's OK too.

The key is conversation, flexibility, and modeling the behaviours you want to see in your children. Technology won't disappear - but we can learn to live with it. Wisely, with perspective, and preferably with a tea that's still warm.

Sources:

UK Government. (2022). Physical activity data tool: statistical commentary, January 2022. Available at: https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/physical-activity-data-tool-january-2022-update
NHS. (2024). Physical activity guidelines for children and young people. Available at: https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/exercise/physical-activity-guidelines-children-and-young-people/
Ofcom. (2025). Children and Parents: Media Use and Attitudes Report 2025. Ofcom. Available at: https://www.ofcom.org.uk/media-use-and-attitudes/media-habits-children/children-and-parents-media-use-and-attitudes-report-2025
Internet Matters. (2025). Children's Wellbeing in a Digital World - Index Report 2025 (Year 4 annual index report). Internet Matters. Available at: https://www.internetmatters.org/hub/research/childrens-wellbeing-in-a-digital-world-index-report-2025/
UK Parliament, Education Committee. (2025). Screen time: impacts on education and wellbeing: Government Response (Third Special Report of Session 2024-25). House of Commons Papers. Available at: https://publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm5901/cmselect/cmeduc/915/report.html